


Dangling soons

by smkkbert



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, figuring out family dynamics, set in season 6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-20
Updated: 2017-10-20
Packaged: 2019-01-20 10:13:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12430644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smkkbert/pseuds/smkkbert
Summary: Three years ago, Oliver dangled maybes on Felicity. Now, they seem to be dangling soons on each other.





	Dangling soons

**Author's Note:**

> This is not meant as critics to the way Arrow has handled Olicity so far in season 6. I just had a thought on how Oliver and Felicity felt about their relationship and wrote this thing. I don't know what exactly this is. Just enjoy!

Felicity had just pushed the button to call for the elevator when she heard Oliver’s voice behind her. She turned around and smiled when she saw him strolling down the hallway in her direction while he was talking to a guy Felicity didn’t know. She didn’t miss how handsome he looked in the dark suit with the blue tie that brought out the color of his eyes.

Oliver seemed to have felt her gaze on his skin as he turned his head towards her, his eyes finding hers immediately. He was still talking to the man next to him when a smile spread on his lips too. How come he looked ten years younger and even handsomer when he was smiling like that? Like, it shouldn’t even be possible for him to be more handsome than he was without even trying.

When the elevator doors opened, Felicity lifted her hand to a short wave and was already about to turn around and leave, but Oliver held her back.

“Felicity, do you have a minute?” he asked.

Felicity hesitated. She had actually been kind of relieved when she had taken care of the error in the intranet of City Hall and Oliver’s assistant had told her that he was still in a meeting. She had hoped she could just sneak away like that, especially since she wanted to meet up with Curtis to discuss their new project a little more. At Oliver’s question, she bit down on her bottom lip slightly and nodded though. She could hardly avoid him when he was asking for her time.

“Yeah, of course.”

It was weird, Felicity thought to herself while she walked up to them. Whenever she wasn’t close to Oliver, she wished she could just go over to him. When they were anywhere outside the bunker and doing anything but chasing criminals, it was almost like she was avoiding him. Sometimes she felt like she wanted to slap herself for that. She didn’t know why she seemed to be so terribly undecided.

As soon as she stood next to them, Oliver put a hand to the small of her back. It made Felicity’s hackles stand on end. Goosebumps spread all the way from the nape of her neck to where the warmth of her hand reached through the thin fabric of her dress. Touches like these weren’t common for them lately. Whenever they reached out for the other, they held themselves back like they were only realizing by the last second that they weren’t quite there yet.

“Felicity, this is Mr. Bryant, the new principal of Star City High,” he introduced her before he turned to his collocutor. “Ms. Smoak offers occasional tech support when our system works against us which, unfortunately, happens way too often these days.”

“I should hold out for someone to help us with our computers at school. The intranet doesn’t work half of the time and even our upskilled teachers have trouble making it work at time. It makes teaching quite difficult. The students and teachers only get frustrated then they try using the computers and they don’t work.” Mr. Bryant chuckled and held out a hand for Felicity. “Very nice to meet you, Ms. Smoak.”

“Very nice to meet you too,” Felicity replied and shook his hand. “If you want to, I can take a look at the software and try to figure out a way to make handling it easier. Large systems like in schools often need a lot of maintenance.”

Mr. Bryant smiled. “If you can make the time, that would be great.”

“That’s not all, though,” Oliver explained. “Mr. Bryant would like to introduce like a little tech fair and workshop to the school year to increase the student’s interest in all things IT-related. I told him that I would ask you if you could help a little with that since you an expert and have a lot of experience.”

“Oh,” Felicity said, unsure what else she could say.

“I know,” Oliver said quickly. “I know it’s a lot and I am just ambushing you with it. I just couldn’t think of anyone better to support a project like that. Admittedly, the timing isn’t so great since you and Curtis just-“

“Mr. Queen?” Elaine, Oliver’s assistant interrupted. “I am sorry, but you got an important phone call from Gotham City.”

Oliver pressed his lips together. He seemed to be considering not taking the call, but sighed eventually. “Excuse me for a moment.”

He took a step back, his hand falling off her back. Cold spread where his hand had spent warmth before. Felicity looked after him when he walked to his office. She knew he had a lot on his plate lately. She doubted he was sleeping much. He was probably sleeping even less than he had these past years and those had already been marked by almost sleepless nights.”

“I am really sorry,” Mr. Bryant said, attracting her attention. “Mr. Queen said it might be promising idea. I didn’t think he’d ask you this directly and so quickly and especially not when I am there.”

Felicity chuckled. “When Oliver is enthusiastic about an idea, he really goes for it. It’s what makes him such a good mayor.”

“Yeah, I see,” Mr. Bryant replied. “I’ve been working in Central City before and I didn’t get much support from the mayor there. At times, that made it quite difficult to offer the students anything special, you know? Everything that needed any commitment of people outside of the school routine was hard to manage.”

“I think that is not something you have to worry about here,” Felicity assured him with a smile. “Oliver appreciates a good school education. If I remember correctly, supporting the schools of the city has been part of his election program. He did have to renounce his candidacy and was only called into office later, but he is still true to the promises he made.”

“I was really excited when he told me he knows you and could ask you to help a little with that project,” Mr. Bryant admitted. “You have worked for him, right?”

“Yeah,” Felicity replied with a slightly forced smile at the thought of her time in Oliver’s anteroom at CQ since she had never exactly signed up for that job voluntarily. “I was his personal assistant during his time as CEO of Queen Consolidated, now Palmer Tech.”

Felicity bit down on her cheek to keep herself from adding that there were other reasons for her to know Oliver too. She guessed Mr. Bryant wasn’t a fan of gossip or otherwise he might have known that she had been engaged with him until like eighteen months ago. It was usually the first thing that was associated when speaking about her and Oliver.

“It would be impressive for the kids to meet someone like you,” the principal added. “You have been to MIT, then worked in a job that you were definitely overqualified for and yet managed to get on the top of the company.”

“Not for very long, though,” Felicity replied with a chuckle. “I have been kicked out.”

“I have heard.” Mr. Bryant nodded slowly. “Sorry.”

Felicity chuckled, waving with her hand. “It’s fine. A friend of mine and I are actually working on building our own company now.”

“Your commitment to technology is impressive.”

“Not that much,” Felicity replied with a chuckle and shrugged her shoulders. “I was just lucky enough that I could make my hobby my job.”

“Yet, it’s inspiring for the kids,” Mr. Bryant assured, “but of course I’d understand if you didn’t have the time or just didn’t want to help. Waking enthusiasm in kids can be quite difficult sometimes.”

Felicity chuckled. “I can hardly say no after all the compliments, right?”

“Well, I hope it would make it harder for you at least.”

Smiling, Felicity reached into her purse and pulled out one of her old business cards, handing it to Mr. Bryant. “Ignore everything but the mobile number. I knew there was a good way to make the cards useful even if I am no longer working for Palmer Tech.”

“In that case, I will give you a call soon, Ms. Smoak.”

Felicity smiled. “Sure. Oh, and just call me Felicity please.”

“Alright. I am Ian. Felicity, I am really glad you agreed to this,” he added after a moment. “I am really good with my students and their parents and everything, but I have to admit that I am slightly awkward when talking to strangers at times. I am sure it sounds like it makes no sense since I am basically a representative of the school, but I can’t help it. Sometimes, when I am in a conversation with people I don’t know, I feel like my mouth speaks before my brain can catch up.”

“Oh, you are talking to the master of deactivating her brain-to-mouth-filter,” Felicity replied. “Really, I am surprising myself with this conversation.”

“I am sure if you got lost in your train of thoughts, it would probably still be cute. It’s a little different for me.”

Felicity chuckled, having to admit that there might be some truth in that. She didn’t exactly consider her own babbling cute and she didn’t want to be considered a cute person if she was honest. Maybe if her IQ was 70 points lower and she wouldn’t have had to fight so much for people to see her badass-ness, it would be different. Anyway, a quirky blonde like her was probably forgiven for babbling more often than a grown man was. Before Felicity could answer and tell him that there were certainly women who would consider it cute nonetheless, Oliver stepped back to them.

“I am sorry,” he said quickly, smiling back and forth between the two of them. “Did you find an agreement?”

“We did,” Ian replied before Felicity could. “I have Ms. Smoak’s number and I guess I will give her a call to invite her to dinner, so we can discuss some ideas and maybe get to know each other a little better.”

Felicity smiled. She knew how hard it could be to move into a new city and make new friends, especially outside of work. A good dinner and talking to someone about something they were both interested in was probably going to help with that. Ian seemed to be quite like her, so it couldn’t be too much of a flop, right?

She was already about to reply that she could also ask Curtis to come with her, so he’d have two IT experts to help with the project, when Felicity noticed Oliver’s weird gaze. He was looking back and forth between her and the school principal, the slightest of a crinkle between his eyebrows. She frowned slightly, cocking her head at him and was already about to ask if something was wrong when-

She looked at Ian with slightly widened eyes, for the first time really taking him in. He was a tall, muscular guy with short, blonde hair and an edgy face. Something cold radiated from his grey eyes. There was no doubt that he looked good and, even if she didn’t know if he was able to do the salmon ladder, he was probably kind of her type.

“Wait,” she said, turning her head to Ian. “You mean getting to know each other as in a date?”

“Well, yes… maybe,” Ian replied. With a short and slightly uncomfortable look in Oliver’s direction, he pushed his hands into the pockets of his pants. “I mean giving it a name always make it so formal, but… since you are bringing it up.”

“Oh, uhm… that… that’s a little unfortunate because I am… I mean…”

“Oh god, I am so sorry,” Ian hurried to say. “I should have known that someone as smart and as beautiful as you has someone in her life and-“

“No, I don’t,” Felicity interrupted him quickly, barely realizing that Oliver tensed a little next to her. “I mean… maybe I do… it’s… my relationship status is basically _it’s complicated_ and I think there is no room for dates, at least not now, probably not ever which is not a maybe. It’s a no, but a very friendly no and I really don’t have anymore time right now because I have to meet up with a friend and he’s probably waiting for me already. Ian, just give me a call when you have time and we talk about that project, just not today and- yeah.”

Felicity turned around quickly, feeling the heat radiating off her cheeks. She was sure she had blushed so badly that her entire face was carrying a dark shade of red.

“Felicity, can’t we-“

“Sorry,” she replied to Oliver, just looking back over her shoulder briefly, “but I am in a bit of a hurry right now. Curtis is probably waiting already. We will just talk soon, okay?”

“But-“

“Sorry.”

Felicity just pushed herself into the elevator right before the doors were closing. The doors didn’t close fast enough for her to not see the disappointed look on Oliver’s face. The broken smile was the last thing she saw before they closed. With a low sigh, Felicity rested her head back against the cool paneling of the wall and closed her eyes.

Why couldn’t things be easier?

* * * * *

When Felicity read the same line for the umpteenth time without being able to even remember a single word, she figured it was time to admit defeat. With a long sigh, she let herself fall into bed. She took a bite from the cold slice of pizza in her hand and dropped the papers to the floor carelessly.

After Curtis had left an hour ago, she had taken a quick shower and gotten into her PJs. She had gotten the rest of the pizza from yesterday and started reading the paper Curtis had left for her, but her thoughts just continued to drift away again and again. All afternoon, she had thought about Oliver. The disappointed look on his face when she had left had haunted her ever since the elevator doors had closed between them.

Things were still complicated between them. Unlike a few months ago, when they had loved but not fully trusted each other, they were hopeful now. Yet, it was still complicated – hopeful, but complicated.

Five months ago, when they had been on the island and Felicity had kissed Oliver just in case, it had been easy. Well, looking back made it seem like it had been easy at least. Back then, all they would have needed to do was making it off the island alive. Then they would have talked and found a way to truly overcome the problems they had accumulated in all the months before. They would have figured out how to move on from everything that had happened to each of them and found out how to be together again, this time without any mistrust between them.

The island had exploded though and that had left them in a chaos as it could barely be any worse. Thea was still in a coma, her condition unchanged since the day they had come back to Star City. Samantha had died, leaving William traumatized on so many levels and with a father he barely knew. It was-

The ringing of the doorbell made Felicity’s thoughts come to a stop. Frowning, she shot a look at her watch. It was almost ten already. The only people who showed up at her doorstep at this time were the delivery guys from the restaurants where she ordered her dinner basically every night. Since she had had leftovers of her pizza from yesterday, she had skipped ordering food today.

When another ringing made her know that whoever was in front of her door was probably not going away easily, Felicity made her way downstairs with a sigh. She took another bite of her pizza and chewed appreciatively when she opened the door.

“Please tell me you are not eating cold pizza from lunch.”

Felicity was so surprised that she was speechless for a moment. Oliver was standing on his doorstep which was a first in quite some time it seemed. Usually, they’d call each other before going to bed every night that they hadn’t been out saving the city together. They were telling each other about their day and chatting lightly, avoiding any too heavy subjects. They didn’t meet up though since Oliver needed to be there in case William woke up from nightmares again. Yet, here he was, dressed casually in jeans and his dark leather jacket, like they had been supposed to meet. He had his arms crossed in front of his chest, his head dipped forward, as he was looking at the slice of pizza in her hand judgingly.

“No,” Felicity replied when she found her voice again, leaning against the door. When Oliver perked up his eyebrow at that, a grin spread on her lips. “It’s from yesterday.”

Oliver rolled with his eyes. “Felicity, pizza is not healthy and I fear old pizza is even worse.”

“We can all need a little junk food at times,” Felicity told him. “Didn’t I bring you and William Big Belly’s a few days ago?”

“Kind of,” Oliver admitted and sighed. “It’s just that neither of us ate it.”

Felicity smiled sympathetically. She knew things were still tense for Oliver at home. William was still suffering the loss of his mother and getting used to living here, never mind processing that he had a father now. She was sure Oliver had tried to get into his son’s good graces, at least a little bit, with the junk food.

“Do you want to come in?”

“Yes, thanks.”

Felicity stepped away from the door, walking over into the kitchen. She put what was left of her slice of pizza back into the carton and rubbed her hands together to get rid off the flour that was stuck on her fingers. Meanwhile, Oliver closed the door behind him and entered what used to be their shared home. The thought delivered a slight stitch to her heart.

“Everything alright at home?” Felicity asked eventually, leaning back against the counters. “I mean as much as it can be alright.”

Oliver stopped in the middle of the room, several feet separating them. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his jacket and shrugged his shoulders. “I guess so. It’s still… William still isn’t really talking to me. We… it’s complicated.”

Felicity smiled. “I know it’s a stupid thing to say and it doesn’t help you at all, but it just needs time. He just lost his mom, the only parent he knew until recently. Besides, he has been abducted twice in a little more over a year and had to change his entire life not once but twice too. William probably suffers from PTSD.”

“Yeah,” Oliver replied with a sigh. “I have been asking Dr. Schwartz if she knew anyone I could ask to help William with that trauma, but finding vigilante-supportive therapists isn’t as easy as it sounds.”

“What about that woman that Cupid went to? She offered you her help, didn’t she?”

“She moved away.”

“Oh.” Felicity pressed her lips together. “That’s unfortunate.”

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “Dr. Schwartz wants to keep eyes and ears open for someone who might be appropriate, but I am not even sure William would go there and talk to anyone. He didn’t want to go to that A.R.G.U.S. therapist Lyla offered though I have to say that woman had some weird vibes surrounding her, so…. He’s only really talking to Raisa.”

“Well, at least he has someone to turn to I guess,” Felicity whispered, unsure what else to say.

“Yeah,” Oliver whispered back. “At least that.”

Felicity bit down on her bottom lip at the sadness in Oliver’s voice. She didn’t know if there was anything she could say that could comfort him. All she knew was that, if there was something she could say to comfort him, she didn’t know what it was. She wished she did, but parenting and everything that even touched that subject, was just something she felt was foreign ground for her. She always listened to everything Oliver had to say about his issues, but she didn’t feel like she could offer much advice.

Eventually, Oliver cleared his throat. “There is something else I want to talk to you about actually.”

“I guess it’s about what happened earlier today?” Felicity asked. When Oliver nodded, she groaned and dropped her face into her hands, adding, “The moment I denied someone being in my life, I knew it was stupid and actually not true. I wasn’t thinking and then-“

When Oliver’s hands touched her shoulders, holding her carefully, Felicity stopped. She took in a deep breath and lifted her head from her hands to look at Oliver. His eyes were gentle, a reassuring look on his face.

Felicity didn’t miss that this was the closest they had been in months. Her skin was tingling where his hands touched her skin and when his forefinger rubbed over the scar the Clock King’s had left on her shoulder, she felt the little butterflies that woke up every time Oliver even looked at her go completely wild. The last time they had had physical contact that was more than a brush of skin against skin, had been when they had hugged after Samantha’s funeral. Oliver had stayed at her grave and promised her that he’d take care of William like he had promised her during her last living moments. Felicity had let him alone for some while and only come back when she had seen him just staring at Samantha’s grave. She had hugged him and told him how sorry she was.

“You have no reason to apologize,” Oliver told her. “Fact is we didn’t really have the talk we said we were going to have. After you kissed me on Lian Yu, I suggested we’d talk when we got off the island, but we didn’t have that talk in the past five months.”

“William is more important right now,” Felicity replied, shaking her head. “When we were in the hospital, we both agreed that there were more important things than having that talk.”

They had been in the hospital, waiting to hear anything about how Thea’s surgery had been going. William had eventually fallen asleep thanks to the light tranquilizer he had gotten. Felicity had held Oliver’s hand when he had whispered her name and started speaking about them. He hadn’t even ended his first sentence, probably about to ask for time since things were going to be busy for him the following weeks, when Felicity had interrupted him, squeezing his hand and reassuring them that there was still time for that some other day.

“Yeah, but that was five months ago,” Oliver replied. “Three years ago, I was dangling maybes on you. Now, I feel like we are dangling soons on each other, you know? We always say we are having this talk soon or moving on soon or find a way to make this work soon, but… we don’t actually do it.”

“Well, like you said, things with William are still complicated,” Felicity replied, shrugging her shoulders slightly. “I don’t want to just slide in there. You two need to get to know each other. Ambushing him with your girlfriend just doesn’t seem like a smart idea right now. It’s just too much for him.”

“I know.” Oliver nodded, stroking his forefinger over her scare once more.

Felicity put her hand to his heart, feeling its strong and even beat, and smiled sadly. “See? We just gotta be patient a little longer. I know it’s hard, but it’s all we can do.”

Oliver lifted his hand from her left shoulder and put it to her hand on his heart. He squeezed her fingers gently. The expression in his eyes was intense, goosebumps spreading all over Felicity’s skin.

“I’d like to ask you out on a date with me,” Oliver whispered, “please.”

Felicity frowned. “Oliver, we just said-“

“I know,” Oliver interrupted her immediately, “and I adhere to what we just said. William needs time and that’s my priority. It’s why I don’t have much to offer to you right now. I am not going to be the perfect boyfriend you deserve. I probably won’t have a lot of time for you. I can’t really include you in my family life yet. I can’t even come over for dinner with you because I need to be home and have dinner with William. Whether or not he eats with me, I feel I have to be there and make him know there is somebody who considers him family.”

“Of course you do,” Felicity whispered.

“I don’t want to make you wait forever, though. I know you are not urging,” Oliver hurried to say, squeezing her fingers once more. “You have been incredibly selfless in all of this and I couldn’t appreciate it more. I am also not asking out of fear. I know what Ian said earlier today is right. You are smart and beautiful and a thousand other things that attract men easily, so I know I can’t make you wait forever-“

“Oliver…”

“Like I said, it’s not about that,” Oliver told her, shaking his head. “The thing is that I love you and I want to be with you. I know it’s selfish because, like I said, I don’t have much to give right now because William needs almost everything I have to give. The little I have to give apart from that though I want to give to you. We have been dancing around each other these past months and, while I know we can’t go all in yet, I’d like us to at least try… I don’t know… making it work with the limited possibilities we have right now. Despite the situation, I want you to know that I will be all in as soon as things have calmed down and I don’t want you to hesitate when you are being asked if you have someone in your life. Like I said, it’s complicated, but I want to be clear on my feelings which are that I love you and I want to be with you. I want to find some way to balance my responsibility towards William and my feelings for you. I know you will probably go short on this agreement way too often and I want to apologize for that already, but maybe there is a chance that it will be enough to carry us through as long as things haven’t calmed down.”

Felicity was holding her breath, processing Oliver’s words. She knew exactly what he had meant with their dangling soons. It had been their way of letting each other know they were in this once the right time had come. It just hadn’t come. Everything he said made sense, but it also made her nervous. She knew his offer was basically going in on their relationship halfway. They’d take the step of flicking the switch from dancing around each other to being with each other. The thing was just that their relationship would be like a side-thing, the cherry on top that would be put to use if there was enough time for it and ignored if there were more important things.

“So, what would that look like?” Felicity asked.

Oliver shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t know. I wish I had an answer to that because that would make me feel less like a selfish ass for asking you to agree to this. The truth is that I just don’t have any answer to this. I wish it was different, but that’s like it is. All I can tell you is that I’d suggest lunch dates for now. I want to be home for dinner, but I am free for lunch which is less romantic, but it would be one hour each day of the week that would be reserved just for you.”

Felicity took in a deep breath, thinking about it thoroughly. Four years ago, when Oliver had almost planned on hanging up the hood because he had seen no other way with his vow to Tommy never to kill again, she had asked him to find another way. He had found another way and he had found another way again and again with each problem they had faced. William was in no way a problem, but, with a kid in the mix, things always got complicated. Things being complicated meant finding other ways.

“Okay, I’m in,” Felicity said eventually, looking at Oliver intently. She nodded at his surprised reaction. “I know it’s not ideal. I know it’s not going to be easy, but I’m in. You are right. Dancing around each other and dangling soons – because it’s not a maybe but a definitely and we just don’t know when the right time comes – is only making it more complicated. I know William has to be your priority and I accept and fully support that. Everything else, we will have to work out with time.”

Oliver looked at her for a moment, tears welling in his eyes. He rested his forehead against hers with a sigh. Felicity closed her eyes, nuzzling Oliver’s nose. She could feel his relief and felt the same relief spreading through her. It was a small step, but it was one that had been long overdue it seemed.

Their foreheads kept pressing together, their noses moving against each other’s. Felicity felt the urge to straighten up on her toes and kiss Oliver, but she felt now wasn’t the right time. They had taken a huge step already, so let’s postpone their first kiss since Lian Yu till after their first lunch date.

“You should go,” Felicity whispered, “in case William has a nightmare or something. He should know you are there.”

Oliver nodded. “You are right.”

His forehead kept resting against hers for a moment, his lips hovering over hers, before he kissed the corner of her mouth. He squeezed her fingers and stroked his forefinger against the scar on her shoulder one last time. Only then did he take a step back.

“So, we see each other tomorrow during your lunch break?” Felicity asked.

Oliver nodded, a smile spreading on his lips. “I will take an extra hour off, so I can cook for you. That way, you won’t need pizza for dinner.”

“I love pizza for dinner.”

“I know,” Oliver chuckled.

Felicity walked to the door next to him. Oliver held the door handle in his hand and just looked at her for another moment before he released a sigh, making Felicity smile.

“Goodnight, Felicity,” he said.

“Goodnight, Oliver,” she replied. “See you tomorrow.”

Oliver nodded and smiled once more before he opened the door and stepped outside. Turning back around to her, he closed the door between them. Felicity’s smile widened and she rested her forehead against the cold glass of the door, closing her eyes.

No more dangling soons, at least not regarding the two of them.


End file.
